Gruntworks Military Humor Safety

Weekend Safety Brief 16JUN17

Horseshoe up you degenerates!

Meach, PUSH!

Anyone seen SGT P or Chop? Last I saw them they were on a liquid lunch break down at the Kilt. I feel like this is not gonna end well.

Shop Now Banner


Well the past few weeks have been a shitstorm of spectacularific proportions. Hajji keep poking the Brits in the eye, the Arabs and Iranians are on the verge of a declared shooting war, Syria is still a mess, Afghanistan sucks and the NorKs are still playing at being the big kid on the Asian block. Meanwhile at home, some ugly, skinny redheaded dude decided it was a good idea to behead a sitting president in effigy and then cry about it when he gets his teeth kicked in. Besides, what dude is named Kathy? Yeesh. There was a good thing for the Don yesterday – that Comey guy decided to actually tell the truth, in spite of what his old boss under the Obama admin wanted. Look for him to commit suicide with a shot to the back of the head shotgun blast – at least that is how the people who piss off the Arkansas Mafia usually end up.

And to top it all off…some jackass Bernie Supporter decided to practice his shitty marksmanship skills at a public park where members of Congress were practicing their batting skills.  Prayers out to Congressman Scalise for a quick recovery; and kudos to the two Capitol Police Officers that had better aim with their pistols than the knucklehead with a rifle.  Score another one for the good guys!

Product Block Gangster Diplomacy

Well, I guess we will all have to stay on permanent high alert with everything going on around the world and Hajji trying to kill innocents at every turn. My opinion? My opinion is we need to take a page from Sherman and make any war against us so fucking terrible that they can’t quit fast enough and their grandchildren will be told stories of American Soldiers coming to get them in the night if they are not good. We need to be the ghat damned boogie man in the mind of Hajji – not the other way around.


Anyway – if anyone sees SGT P or Chop tell them that they owe me a quesadilla and some beers.

Now for the good stuff… Don’t do illegal drugs – drugs are bad…mmmmK?

Don’t beat your wife, don’t kick your dog and don’t be a Jody.

Don’t drink and drive. Uber man – seriously!!

Roll in fireteams and keep your head on a swivel. Avoid contact, but if ya gotta, I damned sure don’t want to tell the Sergeant Major that you lost.

Meach, Recover. Now go find my keys… I think there are a few kilts that need tilting this weekend.

Platoon Sergeants, take charge of your Platoons.


E. Michael Davis II, OMar, CPP, 1SG USA (Ret) served nearly 25 years in the United States Army as a Military Police Investigator. His work focused on Investigations, Anti/Counter-Terrorism Operations, Police Special Operations, Intelligence Operations and Force Protection with multiple Joint and Combined Commands. The impact of his work spanned the spectrum from tactical actions to strategic planning and engagement. In this capacity, he worked closely with nearly every security and law enforcement agency of the United States government, as well as dozens of police, security and intelligence agencies of friendly foreign governments. He experienced multiple combat tours in the Gulf War, Bosnia, Afghanistan, and three tours in Iraq. He is a recipient of two Bronze Stars and the Purple Heart amongst many other awards and honors. He earned a Bachelor's Degree in Military History, Graduate Certificate in Terrorism Studies and Master's Degree in Post 1945 Military History from the American Military University - all with honors. He is still active in the anti/counter-terrorism community as well as a freelance author, historian and blogger.

1 comment on “Weekend Safety Brief 16JUN17

  1. David Fairbanks

    How do the Brita put it? Spot on!
    You rocked this one 1ST. Be frosty n have a great weekend. God’s blessings on you n yours. TXIII% Black7 out.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: